The New Year

As the New Year was welcomed with fireworks (I can't believe how much I love those!), firecrackers, poppers, pistols, and AK-47's (welcome to the land of Kosova), I couldn't stop myself from thinking about what a great life I have been given. Yes, there are days, and moments, when I don't feel that way, but they are few and fleeting. There are days when I look at the disaster that my home is and think, with absolute certainty of how clean my friends' houses are. Of course, I have a picture in my mind of what it looked like the last time I was there and they probably cleaned everything up because we were coming, but it was still clean, and that is what is stuck in my head. There are days, when I get up and look in the mirror and say, "Dear God, can you amazingly make me lose the little donuts around my upper thigh with the lunges that I halfheartedly do today?". And, there are days when I think, "I don't care if I lose track of everything that is going on around me, lose 500 euro dollars, and lose track of the last time my son has eaten (which is often), I'm crawling under his crib and never coming out again!" But, then there are the moments that take my breath away by their poignancy. The moments that I don't even running to get my camera or camcorder for since they will pass before that can happen, and they wouldn't be captured properly anyhow. The moments that touch my heart with just a gently tap and cause a gush of emotion, and normally, tears. The moment when I catch my husband looking at me with wonder just because he had a moment, too. The moment when my Judah stops running around the house in circles (his newest favorite game) and comes running at me for a kiss. Sitting with a hot cup of cocoa, tea, or decaf coffee in my hands. Eating truly delicious food. Getting a personal e-mail from a dear friend. Getting post mail. Smiling. Laughing until your tummy hurts. Crying at a movie that merits it. Accomplishing something new. Seeing a seed poke up from the ground. Looking at pictures of loved ones. Worship music. Choir music. Just about any music. Painting my toenails. Having a clean house when I go to bed. The feeling right after the whole house is clean, right before guests come and it gets messy again. That is why my life is good. That is why I am thankful for it. That is why I am joyful!